Carpe Diem!

Jim:    Ah, greetings once again dear friends.  Welcome to our continuing series of podcasts, Fishing Without Bait – a lifetime without definitive expectations where we jump in and out of the rabbit hole at will and as we choose.  And, as always, today I’m joined by my good friend, and co-producer, and co-host, Mr. Mike.  Mr. Mike, tell me something good about yourself.  Tell me the best thing that happened to you this past week.

Mike:    This past week?  You know what’s great about how things go for me right now?  I don’t have the same office every day.  And that is a beautiful, beautiful thing.  

Jim:    So, that kind of gives you a little bit of excitement, a little bit of freshness every day, doesn’t it?

Mike:    It absolutely does.  Even today I found myself just happenstance – I ended up in a place for a meeting, and I was like that’s perfect.  That’s where my friend works in that building.  So, I stuck around for lunch and squeezed in another meeting in between since I’m like I’m in the area.  We need to talk about this thing.  Let’s do this.  And, everything just lined up perfectly throughout the day.  And, it’s been really nice.

Jim:    That’s beautiful when things happen that way.  So, quite often when people talk about the mindful experience, the fishing without bait, those type of things – we imagine the serene, the sublime, the laying down, letting the warm breeze blow over our cheeks, and the clouds going past, and the beautiful butterflies going across our face.  And, just sitting there in our little daydream.  However, Mike, the title of today’s podcast is carpe diem.  And, to those who may be unfamiliar with Latin, that’s seize the day.  So, we’re going to take our little path of our usual journey today, and we’re going to talk a little about – this is going to be a blunt force podcast.  

Mike:    And, I hope I’m interpreting this right, but I feel like when we talk about mindfulness we talk about let it go.  It’s okay.  I feel like people think that that means you have to be a collectively passive individual, and it’s not necessarily actively pacifism, but just in your mind, right?

Jim:    Mindfulness is paying attention on purpose.

Mike:    There you go.

Jim:    It’s being in the moment.  It’s being in every moment and living in every moment.  

Mike:    Live out loud.

Jim:    Live out loud.  Live life out loud.  Life. Out. Loud.  Let’s consider this a challenge.  I’m throwing up a wake-up call to our dear friends out in the audio land.

Mike:    Wake up podcasters!

Jim:    This is a wake-up call.

Mike:    You awake yet?

Jim:    Our dear friend Ellen Watts has a quote that I like so very much.  She said, “Waking up to who you are requires letting go of who you imagine you are to be.”  Imagine who you are.  Have you ever heard of an author by the name of James Therber, Mike?  I’m sure that you might have heard of his famous short story, which is the Secret Life of Walter Middy.

Mike:    I watched, actually, a fantastic movie.

Jim:    Yes.  So, Walter Middy lived not a life of who he was, but who he imagined he was.  Is that correct?  So, he lived a life of imagination.  He lived a life of wishing who he could be rather than waking up to who he was.  I’d like everyone out there to hear the words I say.  You – you are the one you’ve been waiting for.  You are the one you’ve been waiting for.  Sometimes we wait in life, do we not?  For the people, places, circumstances, events to show up.  

Mike:    One day this is going to happen.

Jim:    Yes.  When, as we often talk about, the wishes and the hopes.  Wishing and hope.  I’m going to throw a challenge out to everyone.  I’d like you to really answer these questions to yourself.  What is holding you back?  Do you have some dreams?  Some aspirations, Mike?  Everyone does.  Let me ask – not necessarily just you, I’m asking everyone out there.  What is holding you back?  Are you waiting for the right time?  The right time will never come if you’re waiting for it.  We make the right time.  Are you waiting until – sometimes we feel we don’t deserve it.  Are you waiting until you feel you deserve it?  Are you waiting for it?  Mike, we’re going to rewrite the rule book.  We’re going to follow rules that aren’t rules.  Forget about waiting for the perfect time.  There is no perfect time.  What time – always, what time is it always, Mike?

Mike:    It’s right now.  

Jim:    It’s right now.  So, what other – what else would be perfect, but right now?  If we’re waiting for the perfect time, it’s not come.  So, what we’re doing is were time traveling.  Are we not?  Waiting for that perfect time.  The perfect time is right now.  I’m going to ask you again.  I’m going to ask everyone out there in the audience.  What time is it?  It’s right now.  That is the perfect time.  What holds us back?  What holds us back, Mike?  

Mike:    I think, usually, that answer is fear.

Jim:    Yes, it is.  

Mike:    And, that can be an interpretation.  

Jim:    It’s a matter of perspective, isn’t it?  

Mike:    Mm-hmm.

Jim:    Most fears are imagined.  Are they not?

Mike:    Right.  Because, we’ve done the dance, and the planning, and the plotting in our head.  And, we see the bad place it goes.  And, then we recoil at that idea.  

Jim:    Sure.  So, when we live on fear, we’re living on assumptions.  Are we not?

Mike:    Right.

Jim:    And, then we’re living that we know what’s going to happen.  Do you know what’s going to happen?  Have you ever found a crystal ball that worked, Mike?

Mike:    Half the time I can’t find a magic 8-ball that works. 

Jim:    That’ll be a subject for another podcast, too.  Mike, do you ever feel that you’re in this alone?  Do you ever feel that you’re in your own world alone?  That your dreams and aspirations are only yours?  And only you can accomplish them by yourself?

Mike:    Which is actually something that I’ve dealt with for a while.  And, I’m in the process of opening that up and letting other people in to assist with my dreams and aspirations – people that share the dreams and aspirations.

Jim:    So, you’re allowing people to help you, is that correct?

Mike:    Right.

Jim:    Sometimes, in our society – in our western society, which is individualistically based, we feel that if we can’t conquer something, if we can’t deal with something on our own willpower, then we’re weak.  And, conversely, Mike, it takes a lot of strength to sit back and say I’m going to let somebody else into my world.  What it does is it allows yourself to be vulnerable, does it not?  

Mike:    Right.

Jim:    For certain.  How do we get rid of these preconceptions?  How do we get rid of these assumptions?  How do we get rid of these things?  Thinking that we need to be ready?  Thinking that there’s a perfect time.  Waiting for that perfect time.  How do we do that?  Number one, what I’m going to challenge everyone out there today is to ask themselves, what’s their base.  What is their foundation of their life?  That if they didn’t have that, they’d have nothing else.  We all need to find our base.  And, we all need to find our center.  The deal is – let’s refer to the recovery world since it’s one I’m so familiar with.  Quite often people say I need to have a relationship.  I need a new house.  I need a new car.  I need these things.  However, in the 12-step world what we say is anything that you put in front of your recovery you are going to lose.  This isn’t supposition.  This isn’t an assumption.  This is based on empirical evidence.  This is based on fact.  So what we want to do, we want to find our center, Mike.  We want to find our base.  We want to find where we’re at, where everything in our life grows from.  For some people it’s spirituality.  For some people it’s recovery.  For some people it is a relationship.  For some people it is.  So, what we want to do – what do we absolutely need?  We look at the fear of failure.  We look at perfectionism.  We look at past regrets.  And, these are things that hold us back.  And, remember this is a challenge podcast, Mike.  This is a challenge podcast.  When we look at relationships, what’s the number one relationship that people leave out of their lives?  It’s the relationship with themselves.  Is it not?  My challenge to everyone out there today is to begin to start that relationship with yourself.  Do you spend a lot of time criticizing yourself?  What type of negative thoughts are you listening to?  And, where are those negative thoughts coming from?  Wake up!  Seize the day!  Is anyone going to seize it for you, Mike?

Mike:    Nope.

Jim:    So, how do you break out of that shell?  How do you break out of that little cocoon?  For those of you who may not have heard the podcast from the past, that comfort zone that we all build.  And, again, this is a call.  Even if you have to program some type of a bugle horn on your phone to do it.  So, what does – in the military and the services, how do they wake everybody up in the morning?  *Since this is a transcript of an audio podcast, I’ll just insert that Jim is doing a vocal bugle call.*  That gets everyone going.

Mike:    With fanfare!

Jim:    Yes!  It gets everybody going.

Mike:    Before you get going!  You’re excited.  Even if you’re in the dead of sleep, that gets you going.

Jim:    So, how does that bugle call – how would that translate into your life?  This is pretty exciting stuff.  I’m passionate about this.

Mike:    I can tell!

Jim:    This is what I try to infuse into the people that I meet in my life.  I try to put across the passion that I have for living – which I wasn’t born with.  Before, let’s say a sporting event – let’s just throw something up in the air, a football game.  Do they sit in there and meditate before the game?  What does the coach do?  What does he give them?  What’s it called?

Mike:    A pep talk.

Jim:    A pep talk.  Right.  And, quite often they’ll have pep rallies, will they not?  So, why cant’ we have a pep rally for ourselves, Mike?  Why can’t we increase that positivity?  And, again, we continue to do things that don’t work.  The seize the day attitude is something we’re going to explore in a series of podcasts.  And, one of the things that we’re going to be talking about in a few of our next podcasts, and we’re really going to get into something – not just telling people to do it.  We’re going to show them how to do it.  We’re going to teach people how to declutter their lives.  We’re going to help people detach themselves from things that hold them back.  How many things are you attached to, and these things become like octopi?  They become that emotional quicksand.  They become those Chinese finger traps that hold us back.  They grab onto us.  And, they’re the things that slow our gears down.  They prevent us from moving forward.  And the thing is – so how do we detach?  By making conscious choice.  My friends – as you can tell, I’m pretty excited about this particular topic.  And, in our next podcast we’re going to be exploring decluttering.  We’re going to be exploring detaching.  We’re going to be exploring letting go.  And, identifying what is holding us back.  This is so exciting.  And, getting back to our base.  Where our lives are so cluttered with nonsense.  Remember our friend, Thomas Merton that we’ve talked about before.  Our minds are like crows picking up every shiny object and sitting in our crowded nest wondering why we’re so uncomfortable.  We’re going to start decluttering.  We’re going to start detaching.  We’re going to make ourselves comfortable and seize the day, my friends.  Until then, Namaste.  

Please check out our website at FishingWithoutBait.com where you can listen to the show, comment on our discussions and find out where you can subscribe to our podcast.  Fishing Without Bait is a production of Namaste Holistic Counseling, P.C.